Thank You Easter Blasphemy, Bawk Bawk
As I’ve said before, I'm only agnostic and dyslexic 2 days out of the year; on Christmas and Easter. And for the rest of the 363 days, I'm just not sure if I believe in doG. Now, some people would say that is blasphemous. And I would say the only thing that rhymes with blasphemous, is, kiss my ass. If you want to get all theological (on my ass) I would remind you the words “Theo” and “Logical” are antagonistic, like an oxymoron. And if you don’t know the difference between agnostic and antagonistic, you are an oxy moron. Which is an oxymoron itself (dictionary.com oxy – denoting something sharp). But that's not my point... My point is, I witnessed pure unbridled blasphemy yesterday...
*Flashback to age 6 or 7...
…I could see their yellow buoyancy through the cellophane wrapper as their blank innocent stares balanced in parallel. As I tore the plastic encasement I could almost hear the pseudo chirps begging for mercy and absolution. Bound together by marshmellowy benevolence, I tore a single hatchling from its coop. The first abrasive bite of heaven, coated my teeth and lips with gritty sweetness. At that exact moment, I knew, Peeps were a gift from doG...
*Back to yesterday...
Yesterday I was shopping for Easter candy and my faith was destroyed. Upon the shelf sat, “Sugar-Free Peeps”
doG Help Us!!!
*Postscript – What position are the Yoga Peeps doing in the picture? Oh yeah, Downward Facing doG…
No comments:
Post a Comment